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In our country, as long as we are of legal age, we are deemed accountable for our behavior. Ignorance of the law does not render a person and 'not accountable'. [My interpretation of the word and 'accountable' is that it is synonymous with the word and 'responsible'.]
Whether we are conscious or unconscious about our actions, we are always accountable for them. Whether we like what we've done or hate it, we are always accountable. Whether we're proud or horrified by our behavior, we are always accountable for it. Being accountable is not good or bad, right or wrong; it just is. That we are accountable is a fact that is not going to change.
So I encourage you to accept accountability. Take responsibility and ownership of your past, present, and future actions. Also, take responsibility for situations and events in your life and - whether you like them, or not!
When we perform according to what we believe is right and important - that is when our actions are in alignment with society's codes of ethics, morals, and justice and - it leads to personal pride, self-esteem, and personal satisfaction. These feelings make it easy to accept accountability for our behavior. When life is rolling along smoothly, if we're fortunate enough to feel peace and joy, it serves us well to remember that we are creating these positive experiences. It's important to acknowledge our accountability and take all the credit we deserve.
However, when events don't go as we would like, or when our behavior is out of alignment with any one of society's codes of ethics, morals, or justice we tend to want to shirk accepting responsibility for what we did, or to deny our part in what went wrong.
Often, guilty feelings cause us to blame something or someone else. I.e., He hit me first; I did not deserve to get fired; It's not my fault; It couldn't be helped; No one told me; It's not my job; I don't have time to exercise; How could I say no to just trying it; I didn't know; I was stopped at a light and got rear-ended and - how could that be my fault?
If we could observe ourselves when we feel victimized, wronged, unfaired against, hurt, maligned, etc. by a person, organization, or situation, we would hear ourselves being whiny and telling and 'the sad story' over and over again. We would feel the perverse kind of righteousness about feeling so wronged, unfaired against, hurt, maligned, etc. We would realize this to be a negative way to feel good, and a good example of self-sabotage.
I urge you instead to look for the lessons you can learn from every life event and -especially the negative ones. If you cannot embrace the belief that you are responsible for everything and everybody in your life, just be willing to try it out for a short period of time. Play a game with yourself that suggests, and "What if I was responsible for all of it?" Ask yourself, and "What is the bigger picture here? Why is this happening to me (to us, to them)? How can I become bigger and better from this adversity? What kind of lemonade can I make from these lemons?"
When you find it difficult to follow through about commitments you make and - to others, or yourself and - enroll a friend, or hire a coach to help you stay on track. It's human nature to succeed at accomplishing more when someone else besides yourself holds you accountable to do what you say you want to do.
Notice by taking some of the steps I listed above that life becomes easier, more peaceful. Notice how much more powerful you feel.*
* I have only touched the tip of the iceberg concerning the how-to's of accepting accountability for your life. Use the free coaching session coupon below to discuss this with me further. I'm willing to assist if I can.
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